Dear INagony,
A number of times now my boyfriend has accidentally called me his
ex-girlfriend’s name, sometimes when we are getting quite intimate. I
really care for him, and I know he does for me too, but it is
gut-wrenching every time he does so. What can I do?
Hysterical from Holloway Road
Ellie: It sounds like your boy is very inexperienced. Even though he does love you, he’s a bit scared and likes to go back to what he feels comfortable with. Snuggle him close and gently correct him. He’ll soon get the message.
Helly: How awkward. You must think he’s fantasising about her in the sack – and he is. Sorry love. But don’t tell me you don’t fantasise about other guys yourself. You’re bound to be annoyed, but remember, he’s only human. Just tell him to be more careful next time!
Dear INagony,
My parents are divorced, and my stepdad has been really kind and supportive over the last few years, like a surrogate father. My real dad has never really been there for me, but I know that in the past few months he has rekindled a sexual relationship with my mum, behind my stepdad’s back. Should I tell him?
Agonised Angel resident
Ellie: Perhaps do a bit of sensitive investigation into how your stepdad’s love life is going. Does he seem very happy with your mum? Or have they grown a bit more distant? And a girlie chat with mum might not be a bad idea either. After all, it’s not just dad’s bad.
Helly: No. Definitely talk to your mother about it first. If you confront your stepdad you’ll just get everybody into a whole lot of trouble.
Dear INagony,
I have been in a relationship with my partner for six years and we are both really keen to have kids. However, my girlfriend is a really heavy smoker, and I don’t want to raise a child in a smoking household. How can I convince her to set aside the fags so that we can bring up our kids smokefree?
Coughing Cally Roadster
Ellie: Addictions can be very hard to deal with, and giving up needs lots of support. Talk to her about your feelings, wrap some nicorette gum in heart-shaped tissue paper, and engage in a little light brainwashing by making sure the pile of magazines in the bathroom is heartily stocked with articles listing the dangers of smoking during pregnancy.
Helly: Give her the choice – fags or kids. If she picks fags, she doesn’t really want the kids anyway!
